About Tim Ford

http://thesqlagentman.com/

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Hey Landlubbers! Win a Free License for SQL Sentry Plan Explorer Pro

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The Origins of the Hairy Execution Plan Contest

Landlubber BadgeSQL Sentry and SQL Cruise are bringing back the Hairy Execution Plan Contest again for our next round of SQL Cruises and those Landlubbers who are not able to join us on the SQL Cruise are now able to play at home as well.  Some of you new to SQL Cruise news may not be quite sure about what a “Hairy Execution Plan” Contest is though.  It’s based upon something that is not nearly as pretty as SQL Cruise, SQL Sentry Plan Explorer, or most things for that matter.

Those of you who have experienced the uniquely American concept of the College Spring Break know what we’re talking about.

The Hairy Back Contest

Yes, the phrase that strikes fear and revulsion into the hearts and minds of any woman and most men who have seen the sights of large, hairy men slathered with cheap suntan oil and placed on display for all to see.  They then cap off the least attractive of any runway walk with a cannonball dive into a pool.

Hairiest Man wins.

Unfortunately (or fortunately) until genetics change or Wookiees find their way into our singles bars and online dating services these Hairy Back Contests, while open to all genders are generally dominated by one.

Our take on the Hairy Back Contest is far more civilized, has been evenly won by all genders, and can be accomplished without the need to grease-up or get wet (though each SQL Professional has their own way of getting through the day.)

The On-Board Edition Rules

Those who have attended one of our SQL Cruises already know how this works and the rules are quite simple:

  1. Download the FREE SQL Sentry Plan Explorer Tool from SQL Sentry.  Did I say free?  I certainly did.  SQL Sentry Plan Explorer is SQL Sentry’s free application that takes the conventional native graphical execution plans that are available inside Microsoft SQL Server Management Studio and turns them on the heads.  The readability of the graphic are much improved and you can sort the operations by many different factors – cost, CPU, memory consumption and more.
  2. Use SQL Sentry Plan Explorer to capture the graphical execution plan from the nastiest of all your Microsoft SQL Server queries.  If you’re not sure of what is your nastiest query I highly recommend using the Dynamic Management Objects – specifically sys.dm_exec_query_stats.
  3. Save the query plan from SQL Sentry Plan Explorer as a .sqlplan file and submit your entry via attachment in an email directed to sqlcruise@sqlsentry.net.  Be sure to include your Full Name and Company Name in the email.  Submitting an entry implicitly allows SQL Sentry and SQL Cruise to use your name, twitter handle and your company’s name in promotion of this event.  If you prefer to not expose your company name please simply state that in your email.  Only the graphical execution plan will be presented by SQL Sentry in the announcements of submission and the winner  – end user data is not exposed in this process.  Also, your contact information will not be shared with other entities.
  4. Submissions are due before we board SQL Cruise Caribbean 2013.  This means midnight, 1/25/2013 Eastern Timezone.
  5. Your submission will be judged by Tim Ford of B-Side Consulting/SQL Cruise and Kevin Kline of SQL Sentry aboard the SQL Cruise; likely while sipping cool drinks in the warm sun.  (Yes we’re rubbing it in because if you really wanted to participate there are still a few seats available aboard SQL Cruise Caribbean 2013.)
  6. SQL Sentry and SQL Cruise will present the top contenders for Hairiest Landlubber Execution Plan once we return from SQL Cruise Caribbean 2013 and will announce the winner on February 7, 2013 here on SQLCruise.com.

 

The Fabulous Prize – For the Landlubber Edition

The declared winner will receive a single seat license of Plan Explorer Pro!  This license prize has a $295 retail value.  While the free version is great, the Pro version takes that greatness to a new level.  Pro Version features include:

  • A Multi-Tab Interface
  • Wait Statistics Information
  • Full Query Call Stack
  • Open *.xdl Deadlock Files

Full details on these features are available at the SQL Server Plan Explorer website.

The Fabulous Prize – For Those Attending SQL Cruise Caribbean

As if the sun, free SQL Server consulting by leaders in the industry, relaxation, in-depth SQL and Powershell training, and networking wasn’t enough incentive to come on SQL Cruise, SQL Sentry is making it even better.  Those attending SQL Cruise who submit a Hairy Execution Plan will have a chance at winning a license of their Power Suite with Fragmentation Manager.  But don’t take it from me, here is what Nick Harshbarger, Vice President of Sales and Marketing at SQL Sentry has to say:

SQL Sentry is providing a full license of SQL Sentry Power Suite as the contest prize.  The Power Suite bundles together their two award-wining software tools Performance Advisor® and Event Manager® into a revolutionary performance monitoring and tuning tool for Microsoft SQL Server 2000, 2005, 2008 and 2012. The software provides unparalleled insight, awareness and control over the true source of SQL Server performance issues. Plus SQL Sentry is including their newest product – Fragmentation Manager, which provides fully integrated point-and-click SQL Server defragmentation. Fragmentation Manager helps you to make good decisions about how and when to defragment, and then defrags indexes faster than ever before via support for multiple concurrent operations. This license prize has a $3,300 retail value.

So, sun, sand, SQL, free consulting, training and at least a 1-in-15 chance of winning a software package for troubleshooting SQL performance valued at $3,300.00.  Why aren’t you going on SQL Cruise?

 

SQL Cruise Caribbean 2013 Detailed Schedule
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SQL Cruise Caribbean 2013 Detailed Schedule

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Just What Does Happen Aboard A SQL Cruise?

Until now the details surrounding the actual events aboard SQL Cruise Caribbean 2013 have been shared only with those attendees (Cruisers) and Technical Leads who are on the Norwegian Epic with us this year. However, we have been fielding a great number of questions about just what does happen on a SQL Cruise. Be it the training events, team-building activities, or free consulting time (we call this our “Office Hours.”) In order to address these questions and give insight into just what the typical week aboard SQL Cruise looks like we are publishing the schedule we’ll be following on this year’s Caribbean training week.

It’s Not Too Late to Experience SQL Cruise

We still have 3 seats open for the Caribbean event and it’s my understanding that there are staterooms still available aboard the NCL Epic. Our personal cruise consultant at Norwegian Cruise Line, Alex Gonzalez, is fully-aware of the availability for both the staterooms and our classrooms. If you’re able to get to South Florida on 1/26/2013 you can still join us! For details on the specific SQL Cruises offered in 2013, including itineraries, cost, and dates please visit our 2013 Cruises page.  Abstract information on the sessions offered for each SQL Cruise in 2013 are available here.

Furthermore, we do have another SQL Cruise in 2013 departing from Seattle with experiences in Alaska and Canada. Explore the site for more details on that event. There are still seats available in that session as well.

Are You Adventurous and Looking for More than Just Sitting in a Classroom for a Week of Training

If you’re adventurous and are ready to take the next step in your SQL Server, Powershell, or Business Intelligence training (or just want to take advantage of free consulting time with leaders in the industry while getting rejuvenated at the same time) you can jump directly to our registration page and find out how you can join us in 2013 aboard SQL Cruise.

Click to view larger image on your screen

Caribbean SQL Cruise Agenda 2013

Download our 2013 Caribbean Agenda PDF

 

A $400 Gift to the SQL Community
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A $400 Gift to the SQL Community

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In the United States we have a tradition of celebrating the things we’re thankful for by driving long distances in order to indulge in a meal with enough calories it could feed a small village for a week with people we have long-held issues with and whom don’t always approve of “how we lead our life” or “what you do for a living” or “that girlfriend from 1991″. We then watch men in odd clothes toss a leather-enshrined mass of air around a giant lawn with lines painted all over it while staving-off sleep due to caloric overload.

We call this Thanksgiving and we celebrate it this week.

SQL Cruise is Thankful Too

We here at SQL Cruise are thankful for the SQL Community.

We’re thankful for the success stories we see from our former Cruisers.

We’re thankful to SQL Sentry, Red Gate, Idera, and Confio; sponsors that continue to help fund and promote SQL Cruise.

SQL Cruise is thankful for our Technical Leads, past and present, who make a SQL Cruise not just another conference but an event offering technical training, free professional consulting, networking, personal and professional development.

All of us who have taken part in a SQL Cruise are also thankful for the opportunities to relax and energize in some very exotic places and for the new friends and professional connections we have made through the years.

SQL Cruise Wants to Share Its Appreciation with You

To show our thanks for those who have joined us and have almost brought us to capacity on our next SQL Cruise in the Caribbean in January 2013 we are making our Early Bird discounts permanent for the 2013 cruises!

That’s right; both cruises are now permanently listed at $1,395, a savings of $400 off our list price.

There has never been a better time to come on a SQL Cruise.  Oh, and that girlfriend from 1991, I’m bringing her!  SQL Cruise welcomes friends and family aboard to be included in events outside of class.

More details are available throughout the website.  Please browse today and contact us if you have any questions.

 

At Summit? Let’s Chat
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At Summit? Let’s Chat

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This week SQL Cruise and practically everyone in the SQL Community will be in Seattle, Washington for the Professional Association for SQL Server (PASS) Community Summit.

If you see us, stop and chat.  Not only about SQL Cruise.  If you have a SQL question pose those as well.  I may not have all the answers but I can probably point you to whomever does have the keys to your particular trunk full of answers.

Don’t forget that prices for SQL Cruise registration will be going up after Summit ends.  We can lock that pricing in for you now if we talk at the Summit and get the registration process kick-started.

Be sure to stop by the SQL Sentry booth at Summit for additional information and some SQL Cruise goodies from our Lead Sponsor while they last as well.

 

 

Early Bird Discount for SQL Cruise 2013 Ends 11/15!

Early Bird Discount for SQL Cruise 2013 Ends 11/15!

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We’re Getting Close

It’s hard to believe we’re getting close to our next season of SQL Cruises but we are! As a result, for the few remaining seats we have open, we are extending the Early Bird discounted rate of $1395 for the 2013 SQL Cruise through SQL Connections and PASS Summit events.

However, effective 11/15/2013:

  • The registration rate for our Caribbean 2013 SQL Cruise will increase to the full rate of $1795.
  • The registration cost for our Alaskan 2013 SQL Cruise slated for May will increase from $1395 to $1595 – still $200 off the full rate of $1795 through the end of the year.

 

We Want You To Register Early!

SQL Cruise is not your typical SQL technical conference. First of all it’s on a boat! Of greater importance though is the sense of community we attempt to build for each event and that requires attendees to register early and start communicating with one another through our private forums, Google Hangouts (scheduled to start after PASS Summit) and at the Summit itself with private activities just for past, present, and future SQL Cruisers.

By interacting before getting to the ship we find that we have a considerable jump-start towards our goals of not just providing top-tier technical SQL Server, Powershell, and Business Intelligence training – but building stronger, more-competent, and highly-valued personalities out of our attendees. Are you interested in making yourself more valuable to your company? Are you interested in taking your career to the next level as someone sought after not just for their technical prowess, but also their ability to articulate their knowledge to team members and customers alike, build consensuses, or utilize their network of fellow SQL Professionals to provide better service? Then SQL Cruise is exactly what you’re looking for in an educational event and the sooner you register and start participating the more you’ll benefit.

But the Company Won’t Pay for It!

If this is the case you have a couple of options.

Option One:

Ask your company if they will at least allow you to attend at your own cost, but in exchange not dock hours you’ve accrued for PTO. Yes, this event takes place in exotic locations and on cruise ships. We get it – your company thinks this is a vacation. We can point you to any of our former SQL Cruisers who could clarify this assumption with your Manager, Boss, etc. When we are at sea we are in class. When we are outside of class we’re still networking, hosting workshops on “soft skills”, and we’re also providing consulting – troubleshooting real issues in your environments with leaders in the SQL Community and your fellow SQL Cruisers – at absolutely no additional cost to your company. When you’re getting tailored technical advice from consultants routinely charging over $300/hour for their services the least your company could do is not charge you for PTO.

Option Two:

Dip into that PTO balance! 

Even if your company won’t invest in you – you can and have a great time while doing so.

Because when we are in port the days are yours and you deserve it!  You are also encouraged to bring your family with you on a SQL Cruise.  We welcome them as we do you.  They’re more than welcome to take part in all social events, and if a particular topic is of interest they’re welcome to join so long as there are open seats in our dedicated conference room.  For Buck Woody’s sessions on communication and career aboard SQL Cruise 2011 Alaska we had many spouses and partners that joined us making those workshops our first-ever Standing Room Only events aboard SQL Cruise.  (In case you’re interested too he is back this year for our Alaska 2013 SQL Cruise.)

You routinely work well over 40 hours a week. You’re responsible for critical systems 24 hours a day; 7 days a week and deserve some down time, but just like me you probably still love talking shop with anyone who will listen.  This is the best vacation ever in the history of vacations for you then:  you get downtime and are encouraged to talk shop!

Even if your company still doesn’t waver on this argument you are traveling for the benefit of education and business. Depending on your tax situation a portion of these expenses may be deductible based upon the tax laws in your region.

What are You Waiting For?

We anticipate we will be closing registration on the Caribbean 2013 SQL Cruise by the end of the PASS Summit in early November. Don’t gamble and put off registering until after the event. Go to www.sqlcruise.com/register/ today and find out how you can attend the what is sure to be one of those events you’ll look back on over the course of your career as a key moment in your success.

Learn. Network. Relax. Grow. Just Add Water.

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